Survived the Family Reunion

This last weekend was the first family reunion in about twelve years. Seventy people representing all points of the nation converged on a suburb near Phoenix, AZ to catch up, reminisce, and eat foods they have not seen in a decade or more. To the uninitiated, the orgy of food would recall images of pure gluttony. To this small collection of people, it was the opportunity to express the love of childhood and family. To reaffirm a love through the expression of carefully preparing the foods of celebration. To be part of something larger than yourself. Larger than your siblings. To bask in the warm glow felt when everyone working together produces something the tribe will share. Then, to be able to sit back and watch as the smiles appear when they take that first bite. The memories produced at these events sustain me as I wonder when I will see my family next.

Throughout my childhood, events like this were common, occurring almost every week. The faces were mostly the same and while the food was always slightly different, the feelings were always identical. People coming together to share in joy and love.

The elders were all there directing the second generation, the second generation was directing their children in manners, respect, and when to perform heavy lifting. The third generation was left pretty much to play and be held at the elders whim.

I had forgotten now much my family likes to gamble. There was a permanent poker game going the entire time. Not being immune to the call, I set in on a couple of sessions. I came to a halt I found myself dividing my time exclusively between filling a plate and holding cards.

It was this and more. I will not speak to the unbound eating I participated in because I do not want to sully the great memories recalled and made. That will be a post for another day (tomorrow, probably).

-nn

Goal attained: 60 pounds finally!

I am aware it has been an entire week without a post. Work hit me hard and missing my elusive sixty mark last week killed my creative streak. Imagine my surprise when I discovered I finally broke the into the 60-65 pound weight range! I weighed in last thinking I would have just barely made the .6 pounds required to hit sixty. Lo and behold, my weekly total was 2.6 pounds. The sweat and work is paying off and know I am thinking I could actually make my published goal weight of 179 (but don't hold your breath for that one).

I have stepped up the resistance for my fifteen minutes on the bike:
Old settings:
- 3 min @ level 8
- 12 min @ level 10

New settings:
- 2 min @ level 8
- 11 min @ level 10
- 2 min @ level 12

The weights have gotten progressively heavier, favoring more weight and and fewer reps, rather than the multiple dead slow reps I started out with. Talking with trainer M helped more than he knows.

Additionally, I started finishing up with a three minute pilates session which concentrated on my abs. Of which I can for the first time in twenty years.

-nn

min post

it is 2339 on wednesday night. i have been working since 0730.

the build is not ready for testing. i am the only one who can post it.

am fading fast. it is still not ready.

i get paid for doing this............

at times, it makes me ill that it happens this way.

-nn

Want more effective work outs?

Breath like a baby. Seriously.

Take some time and watch a baby breath. For those unable to observe a small child, watching an animal sleep will do in a pinch. It is most evident if they are sleeping. You will notice when a baby inhales, their stomach rises. The baby is breathing from their core (diaphragmatic breathing, if you care for professional speak). The baby is breathing in a most natural state.

Somewhere on the way to adulthood (and the acquisition of an ego), we are taught to be an adult is to be fit. Or at the very least, to give the appearance of being fit. This is when we all start breathing by inflating our chest. Most times, we are not even aware we are doing it. The bad part about it is we cannot effectively fill our lungs with that most precious commodity of oxygen.

Breath like a baby.

-nn

Motivation = NULL

My motivation to accomplish anything at work is positively nil. I have been able to gather a few coherent thoughts into a passable list of items, but executing on them is an ongoing challenge. I think the ISO audit took more out of me than expected. There are dozens of little, niggling tasks that I just do not care to deal with. Of course, all of them are a priority one and need immediate attention. But for the life of me, I cannot get the brain cells focused long enough to do more than just nudge them along. I feel satisfied just to get the most immediate next step started, normally by someone in another department. I am complacent to remain in an interrupt driven mode, rather than pro actively take charge of the list until each one is completed.

I feel quite happy to focus on the minutiae of each task rather than the entirety because there is comfort in getting lost in things familiar. Whereas, if I were to tackle a bunch of unknowns, I would feel without direction. A silly human condition, but there is some comfort to be had in following it.

-nn

Damn, damn, damn

Well, hell. I was reluctant to weigh in last night, and it goes to show you: if you think you gained weight, you most likely did. I went up 0.4 pounds. Not a tragedy, but it appears the mighty 60 pound mark still eludes me. Thinking back over the last week, I am fortunate I did not put on more. Being sick all week and having to work is not the best frame of mind to be in. Normally, when I am sick, I just eat whatever comes into view. You know the "feed a cold..." axiom? I live by that. At least I used to. Whatever. So starts another week of critical consumption.

The workout was fragmented today. The remnants of my cold hindered me, forcing me to go blow my nose three or four times. Trying to breath was interesting. I did manage to push more weight than ever and the slow sets were not as productive as they could have been. Guess my mind was not fully committed to the session.

Picked up a new camera for J. She has been really down since Miss B and family picked up and moved out of town. I am hoping this new toy will help her out of her doldrums. It pains me to think there is a part of her I cannot heal. This is all up to her.

-nn

Recovering

There is so much to catch up on. We had a MAJOR ship date last week and my presence was required at work. In itself, not a big deal, but the kicker was I caught the stupid seasonal cold going around the office. I was jacked up on cold drugs the entire week. This combined with the long hours made the week less than desirable (downright intolerable, to be precise). The good news is we shipped on time, which is a huge accomplishment in the face of all the other activities which were occurring at the same time.
My work outs suffered greatly and I was too zonked out and over booked to make it to the gym or the Weight Watchers meeting. Come to think of it, I missed attending. I never would have thought I would miss sitting in a room lamenting (and celebrating) the woes of weight loss (or is that weight gain?), but one really does not know unless one does without, right?
I felt strong enough to work out this morning, I do not think the good feeling would have lasted until this afternoon, if I had waited. The run over was slower but not painful, so I am taking that as a good sign. I power lifted, working on chest and arms, while throwing in a smattering of heavy abs and core. The sweat was pouring off me. It was much easier than I thought it would be after not doing anything for five days. Another good sign.
Normally, when I am sick, I go so far off program I do not think I will find my way back. This time, I remained aware of the food I was eating and even kept up on drinking my daily water. I actually think it helped me get better faster.
-nn

I am the Pot calling the Kettle black

I do not know exactly when it started happening. The realization of my behavior just occurred, leaving me feeling a little unbalanced. I cannot explain it, I just know I started doing it.

The first time I realized it happened when I was out picking up food for yet another late night stint for work. I was going to a local sandwich shop picking up a totally sensible meal. In the strip mall were other grease-laden alternatives (which are getting easier to ignore, so long as I do not get a whiff of french fries). I noticed a guy getting out of a small car. Being a larger guy I noticed he had to heft himself out of the car and the car showed its relief by raising itself to its proper distance from the ground. This was a big guy. He and the driver were obviously going to eat at the grease shack to enjoy all of its trans fat goodness. Then it happened. I said out loud "Dude, like you need to go in there". For the first part, there was no one in the car with me, so I was talking to myself, so that raises some minor weirdness points. The major point of this stream of consciousness post is: "Who the hell am I to criticize someone else's food choices?".

What the hell was I thinking about? Where in my psyche did a thought like this come from?

-nn